If the relationship is not a good one, then she’s going to use menopause as a reason for saying, ’I don’t have to do that anymore. I can go play mah-jongg with my girlfriends. I can go do other things and I don’t have to deal with this anymore.’ That’s what we have to change. We have to say this is a lifelong process, and we have to say, work on the relationship. That’s why it’s so important to talk about the relationship. Ruth Westheimer