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More - Joy Maniscalco Quotes

I think nostalgia takes over when we think about people we once loved, and we tend to pick out all of the good parts. I could very easily sit here and say I still think about the one that got away, but the truth of the matter is that he didn't get away, he walked away...and I'm the girl he walked away from. - Joy Maniscalco Quotes

I think nostalgia takes over when we think about people we once loved, and we tend to pick out all of the good parts. I could very easily sit here and say I still think about the one that got away, but the truth of the matter is that he didn't get away, he walked away...and I'm the girl he walked away from.

If you know someone is going to punch you, should you close your eyes and pretend it's not going to happen? or should you be alert, eyes wide open, ready to defend yourself? I don't know about you, but I'd rather see the punch coming than get hit when I'm not looking. Will I be in pain either way? Yes, but I'll have the band aid ready. - Joy Maniscalco Quotes

If you know someone is going to punch you, should you close your eyes and pretend it's not going to happen? or should you be alert, eyes wide open, ready to defend yourself? I don't know about you, but I'd rather see the punch coming than get hit when I'm not looking. Will I be in pain either way? Yes, but I'll have the band aid ready.

why would you want a man that isn't completely yours? I don't even like sharing my dessert, let alone a person! To be even more blunt, I don't even like when people double dip their chips, so why would I want someone who double dips their dick? - Joy Maniscalco Quotes

why would you want a man that isn't completely yours? I don't even like sharing my dessert, let alone a person! To be even more blunt, I don't even like when people double dip their chips, so why would I want someone who double dips their dick?

When you do find love--real love, it's the most wonderful, awful feeling in the world. There's nothing like it. Love can make you feel invincible and vulnerable all at the same time. You're trusting someone with the most precious part of you...your heart - Joy Maniscalco Quotes

When you do find love--real love, it's the most wonderful, awful feeling in the world. There's nothing like it. Love can make you feel invincible and vulnerable all at the same time. You're trusting someone with the most precious part of you...your heart

Heart

Real love isn't ordinary. Real love isn't artificial. Real love isn't something you can buy or manufacture, because it's not something you can sell. It doesn't wash away with a rainy day or evaporate when things get too heated. It sustains itself because that's what your heart does, it sustains the rest of you. - Joy Maniscalco Quotes

Real love isn't ordinary. Real love isn't artificial. Real love isn't something you can buy or manufacture, because it's not something you can sell. It doesn't wash away with a rainy day or evaporate when things get too heated. It sustains itself because that's what your heart does, it sustains the rest of you.

The common misconception is that women who like to be treated a certain way are high maintenance. It's not being high maintenance, it's called having class - Joy Maniscalco Quotes

The common misconception is that women who like to be treated a certain way are high maintenance. It's not being high maintenance, it's called having class

Class

No one should ever feel bad about themselves when the hot guy talks to the ugly girl instead. There's nothing wrong with you. I'm sure you looked like a certified 20 and your cleavage was noteworthy. Don't go home and cry because,

No one should ever feel bad about themselves when the hot guy talks to the ugly girl instead. There's nothing wrong with you. I'm sure you looked like a certified 20 and your cleavage was noteworthy. Don't go home and cry because, "no one even looked at you". I've solved this disturbing puzzle and here's the bottom line- She was drunk, he was horny. She was easy, and he'll just hit it from the back so he doesn't have to look at her ugly face.

Some day you'll have someone worth holding on to... Someone who won't ever want to let you go...Someone who won't make you wonder if they were the one who got away, because that someone will be right there beside you, thanking the other someone who let you get away. - Joy Maniscalco Quotes

Some day you'll have someone worth holding on to... Someone who won't ever want to let you go...Someone who won't make you wonder if they were the one who got away, because that someone will be right there beside you, thanking the other someone who let you get away.

I don't need a man to make me happy. I want a man who adds to my happiness in a way that is so indescribable, not even Webster could find written word to explain it. - Joy Maniscalco Quotes

I don't need a man to make me happy. I want a man who adds to my happiness in a way that is so indescribable, not even Webster could find written word to explain it.

Have you looked around lately? There are more muffin-top, camel-toe, wedgie-assed women on the street than hotdog stands! These women need to take a hard look in the mirror, and be honest with themselves. No one knows what size is labeled on the inside of your clothes. Please, for the love of God, buy the bigger size, because we're all a bit tired of looking at the outline of your labia! - Joy Maniscalco Quotes

Have you looked around lately? There are more muffin-top, camel-toe, wedgie-assed women on the street than hotdog stands! These women need to take a hard look in the mirror, and be honest with themselves. No one knows what size is labeled on the inside of your clothes. Please, for the love of God, buy the bigger size, because we're all a bit tired of looking at the outline of your labia!

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