Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill. - Johnny Carson Quotes
Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill. Johnny Carson
 American Comedian Funny

More - Johnny Carson Quotes

I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing. - Johnny Carson Quotes

I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.

Johnny Carson

 American Comedian Funny
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself. - Johnny Carson Quotes

I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.

Johnny Carson

 American Comedian Death Funny
Talent alone won't make you a success. Neither will being in the right place at the right time, unless you are ready. The most important question is: 'Are your ready?'' - Johnny Carson Quotes

Talent alone won't make you a success. Neither will being in the right place at the right time, unless you are ready. The most important question is: 'Are your ready?''

Johnny Carson

 
If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners. - Johnny Carson Quotes

If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.

Johnny Carson

 American Comedian Funny
New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time, most unsolved. - Johnny Carson Quotes

New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time, most unsolved.

Johnny Carson

 American Comedian Funny
The difference between a divorce and a legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money - Johnny Carson Quotes

The difference between a divorce and a legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money

Johnny Carson

 Divorce
Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson Quotes

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.

Johnny Carson

 American Comedian Christmas Funny
Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president. - Johnny Carson Quotes

Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.

Johnny Carson

 American Comedian Democracy Funny
He couldn't ad-lib a fart after a baked-bean dinner - Johnny Carson Quotes

He couldn't ad-lib a fart after a baked-bean dinner

Johnny Carson

 
When turkeys mate they think of swans. - Johnny Carson Quotes

When turkeys mate they think of swans.

Johnny Carson

 American Comedian Funny
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