More - Dennis Miller Quotes

There's no doubt about it, show business lures the people who didn't get enough love, attention, or approval early in life and have grown up to become bottomless, gaping vessels of terrifying, abject need. Please laugh.

Dennis Miller

 Approval

It's ironic that in our culture everyone's biggest complaint is about not having enough time; yet nothing terrifies us more than the thought of eternity.

Dennis Miller

 American Comedian Funny

Police in Washington D.C. are now using cameras to catch drivers who go through red lights. Many congressmen this week opposed the use of the red light cameras incorrectly assuming they were being used for surveillance at local brothels.

Dennis Miller

 American Comedian Funny Police

You've got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven okay?

Dennis Miller

 

Liberals should not overplay this weapons of mass destruction card, because you want me to tell you the truth? Most of us are not going to care if they don't find these weapons of mass destruction. It's enough for a lot of us to see those kids smiling on that street again.

Dennis Miller

 American Comedian Funny

Sure, the lion is king of the junglebut airdrop him into Antarctica,& he's just a penguin's bitch

Dennis Miller

 

I lapsed into rude.

Dennis Miller

 American Comedian Funny

Technology is fine. . ., but that popular vision of the future, where you plug somebody in and leave them there and they don't get out and interact with actual flesh-and-blood humans -- you know the answer before I say it -- that's not good.

Dennis Miller

 Future

A recent conversation: Dubya: Look at the clock, time is racing! Cheney: That's the second hand, George.

Dennis Miller

 

A recent conversation: Dubya: Look at the clock, time is racing! Cheney: That's the second hand, George.

Dennis Miller