All the kiss-and-tell stories I have been involved with - and remember they only account for about 25 per cent of my business - the accent has always been on the ridiculous, also on the complimentary. Always women will say, so-and-so was the most amazing lover, even if the man in question was absolutely hopeless. Even with old David Mellor, the girl said he was very good in bed. No, I don't think I have that cruel streak, John. It's not in my nature. Max Clifford