More - Robert Benchley Quotes

Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini?

Robert Benchley

 American Comedian Funny

For a nation which has an almost evil reputation for bustle, bustle, bustle, and rush, rush, rush, we spend an enormous amount of time standing around in line in front of windows, just waiting.

Robert Benchley

 American Comedian Funny

An ardent supporter of the hometown team should go to a game prepared to take offense, no matter what happens.

Robert Benchley

 American Comedian Funny

I can't seem to bring myself to say, "Well, I guess I'll be toddling along." It isn't that I can't toddle. It's that I can't guess I'll toddle.

Robert Benchley

 

It is rather to be chosen than great riches, unless I have omitted something from the quotation

Robert Benchley

 

I have been told by hospital authorities that more copies of my works are left behind by departing patients than those of any other author.

Robert Benchley

 American Comedian Authorities Funny

There is something about saying "Ok" and hanging up the receiver with a bang that kids a man into feeling that he has just pulled off a big deal, even if he has only called the telephone company to find out the correct time

Robert Benchley

 Kids

I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.

Robert Benchley

 American Comedian Funny

"Perfectly Scandalous" was one of those plays in which all of the actors unfortunately enunciated very clearly

Robert Benchley

 Acting And Actors

Death ends a life, not a relationship.

Robert Benchley

 American Actor Death