More - Al Franken Quotes

The biases the media has are much bigger than conservative or liberal. They're about getting ratings, about making money, about doing stories that are easy to cover.

Al Franken

 American Comedian Conservative Funny

I once asked the most fabulous couple I know, Madonna and Guy Ritchie, how they kept things fresh despite having been married for almost seven months. 'It's a job, Al,' Guy told me. 'We work at it every day.'

Al Franken

 American Comedian Funny

Mistakes are a part of being human. Appreciate your mistakes for what they are: precious life lessons that can only be learned the hard way. Unless it's a fatal mistake, which, at least, others can learn from.

Al Franken

 American Comedian Funny Life

It's easier to put on slippers than to carpet the whole world.

Al Franken

 American Comedian Funny

I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and dog-one it, people like me.

Al Franken

 People

When you encounter seemingly good advice that contradicts other seemingly good advice, ignore them both.

Al Franken

 Advice American Comedian Funny

He [Newt Gingrich] is the most unpopular politician in America. His favorable rating is only four points higher than the Unabomber.

Al Franken

 America

The irony upon irony of this lawsuit was great. First, Fox having the trademark 'fair and balanced' -- a network which is anything but fair and balanced. Then there's the irony of a news organization trying to suppress free speech.

Al Franken

 Irony

A brief digression on whether that suspicious-looking mole is actually cancer. ... Take this simple test called the ABC test. 'A' is for age. What is your age? Is it over thirteen? If so, it's cancer. That's how the ABC test works.

Al Franken

 Cancer

not good enough to be endorsed by Fox News.

Al Franken

 News