Your highness, when I said that you are like a stream of bat's piss, I only mean that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around it is dark - Monty Python Quotes
Your highness, when I said that you are like a stream of bat's piss, I only mean that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around it is dark Monty Python
 

More - Monty Python Quotes

First you must find... another shrubbery! (dramatic chord) Then, when you have found the shrubbery, you must place it here, beside this shrubbery, only slightly higher so you get a two layer effect with a little path running down the middle. (

First you must find... another shrubbery! (dramatic chord) Then, when you have found the shrubbery, you must place it here, beside this shrubbery, only slightly higher so you get a two layer effect with a little path running down the middle. ("A path! A path!") Then, you must cut down the mightiest tree in the forrest... with... a herring!

Monty Python

 
Always look on the bright side of life. - Monty Python Quotes

Always look on the bright side of life.

Monty Python

 Ambition
No it can't! An argument is a connected series of statements intended to establish a proposition. - Monty Python Quotes

No it can't! An argument is a connected series of statements intended to establish a proposition.

Monty Python

 
I don't think there's a punch-line scheduled, is there? - Monty Python Quotes

I don't think there's a punch-line scheduled, is there?

Monty Python

 Acting And Actors
Jesus did. I was hopping along, when suddenly he comes and cures me. One minute I'm a leper with a trade, next moment me livelihood's gone. Not so much as a by your leave. Look. I'm not saying that being a leper was a bowl of cherries. But it was a living. I mean, you try waving muscular suntanned limbs in people's faces demanding compassion. It's a bloody disaster. - Monty Python Quotes

Jesus did. I was hopping along, when suddenly he comes and cures me. One minute I'm a leper with a trade, next moment me livelihood's gone. Not so much as a by your leave. Look. I'm not saying that being a leper was a bowl of cherries. But it was a living. I mean, you try waving muscular suntanned limbs in people's faces demanding compassion. It's a bloody disaster.

Monty Python

 
We apologise for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible have been sacked. - Monty Python Quotes

We apologise for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible have been sacked.

Monty Python

 
He's not pining, he's passed on. This parrot is no more. He has ceased to be. He's expired and gone to meet his maker. He's a stiff, bereft of life, he rests in peace. If you hadn't have nailed him to the perch he'd be pushing up the daisies. He's rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-parrot! - Monty Python Quotes

He's not pining, he's passed on. This parrot is no more. He has ceased to be. He's expired and gone to meet his maker. He's a stiff, bereft of life, he rests in peace. If you hadn't have nailed him to the perch he'd be pushing up the daisies. He's rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-parrot!

Monty Python

 
What? Ridden on a horse?''Yes''You're using coconuts!''What?''You've got two empty halves of coconuts and you're banging them together!''So? - Monty Python Quotes

What? Ridden on a horse?''Yes''You're using coconuts!''What?''You've got two empty halves of coconuts and you're banging them together!''So?

Monty Python

 
Tis but a scratch''A scratch?! Your arm's off!''No, it isn't. - Monty Python Quotes

Tis but a scratch''A scratch?! Your arm's off!''No, it isn't.

Monty Python

 Funny
We are no longer the knights who say ni! We are now the knights who say ekki-ekki-ekki-pitang-zoom-boing! - Monty Python Quotes

We are no longer the knights who say ni! We are now the knights who say ekki-ekki-ekki-pitang-zoom-boing!

Monty Python

 Funny
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